The Sounds of Advice #69: Can Men and Women be Just Friends?

Kate: Absolutely. I have had many good friends of the opposite sex over the years. And I mean, if they can't really be friends, then what does that mean for the LGBT community? Being a pansexual myself, wouldn't that mean I wouldn't have any friends? LOL Obviously, sometimes feelings can develop, but that's not always the case. 

Sid: Ah. The age old question. If you ask me, I usually have one of two answers. My superficial/joking “Yes, because gay people exist,” or if you wanted my serious answer I would say that society is a little too obsessed with this notion that being attracted to a gender equates to being attracted to everyone of that gender. We also tend to hyper-sexualize and hyper-romanticize just about everything people do, from a really young age.

“Straight men and women can't be friends because they'll automatically fall in love or be attracted to each other.” People say stuff like this with any gender attraction, and honestly? It's a little annoying. Don't get me wrong, it's one thing to make jokes along these lines, that's not really what I’m referring to here.

I just think society is a little too obsessed with sex and relationships. A man and a woman can be just friends. Obviously there is a chance of feelings developing, but there's a bigger chance that they won’t and that they just want to be friends and enjoy each other's company.

We did a quick Facebook poll and this is what people said:

Yes, I am friends with my ex [Dan] -Lori M.

I think so. I think it just depends on their feelings for each other, and what their past with each other was like. -Heather K.

Of course - two of my best friends in the whole world are guys. -Debbie K.

My BFF is a guy, and we've never had anything other than a platonic relationship for 25 years now.

 -Liz H.